It’s My Job

Have you ever tried to explain to a 3 and 4 year old that everything you do is for “their own good”? Yeah the good old mom line. I did that yesterday. I kid you not; I totally pulled that on my toddlers. What’s even strangers is that I think they understood it. I said something like, “My job is to take care of this family and sometimes that means stopping you from doing things you want to do because I know that thing can hurt you even though you may enjoy it.” One of them responded with, “Yes, just like when you tell us not to jump on the bed because it can break and we will fall and get hurt and we won’t have any place to sleep either. But sometimes we still keep doing it so you have to stop us angrily.” That makes my anger and yelling look real good, doesn’t it?

I digress.

You would think I’m exaggerating the level of understanding my children have,  but I’m not. I wish I had taught of this example myself. I realized that there is so many things we can make them understand that we never bother to because we think they are too young to comprehend. The only thing they’re too young for is putting words to what’s in their heads. We just need to help them with that. Once that starts to happen I think it will be easy to figure out what is the extent of their comprehension, which is definitely beyond what we as parents usually expect.

The interesting thing is on the one hand we brag about our children to whomever that would listen. On the hand we under estimate their abilities almost every step of the way. Why we do that is really beyond MY understanding.

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There are many things as the caretaker of the household that I have to do that my children don’t understand. This was becoming a constant cause of tension between us, specially as they get older. I didn’t know how to make them understand every step of the way. They had so many questions, some I can answer for them but some things they just have to trust me with. I wasn’t sure how to handle that. So one day I had this conversation with them.

This is not the end of it, not by a long shot. I have to keep talking about it and keep reminding them that this is the reason I do certain things and ask them to do certain things they don’t understand or don’t like. They still complain and give me a hard time but they now fight me less and are less frustrated.

Which obviously means I’m less frustrated and screaming way less.

I would definitely encourage sitting down and having this talk with your children no matter how young they are. This is not a one-time conversation but it is definitely helpful.

Talk to our children. Who would have thought, right?

 

It’s Not The Woman

The election is over. We have a president, and it’s not the woman. What a shock! Right? It’s a shock because it’s that man who makes us see and hear the truths we don’t want to. It’s a shock because we don’t want to know how much we are not welcome and wanted among the people we consider our own. We are saddened and disappointed because we can’t believe after all this time Americans wouldn’t want a woman to make decisions for them.

Problem isn’t that Donald Trump is a man hell bent on gaining power and destroying us in the process; the problem is, he is us. He’s our hidden face in its full glory shinning in the light of day for all to see. And guess what? Its pretty ugly. So ugly that even we are trying to look away and disown it.

It would be pretty easy to blame this entire chaos on the men of the country but a presidential race in not won only by the men. It’s not won without the help of the women who cry “feminism” and who cry “male dominance” at every step in their lives. So what happened when you had to tick that little box for a man who is the ugly side of every man or for a woman who was qualified for the job? You chose the man? At least some of you did. Those of you who did, don’t you dare complain about another man in your life again. Because you chose them to dominate and rule you as they please and by choices you make it seems you don’t mind it either. You took away your right to complain and your right to fight for it yourself.

So what’s next? Are we just really really screwed?

Anyone who might think that I am a Hillary supporter, I am definitely not. I don’t think Hillary Clinton was the lesser of two evils. I don’t know what she is. But we know for sure what he is. He was something to stay far away from. Her, we needed to give a chance…maybe it would have been a bad idea. I don’t know. But there’s no way this isn’t going to end badly. Time has come though, to move on and mend our differences. What’s done is done. I am ready to move on. I have no grievances with anyone. In fact if you voted for Trump please don’t tell me and we will continue to be friends and just move along.

However, this man spent months and months spewing hate against me and anyone else he chose. Let me have my day or week of mourning and sadness. It’s my well-earned, well-deserved right to say what I need to about him. We’ll come together and work harder than ever I’m sure to put right what he has broken in all of us. But right now I’m heartbroken and disappointed in my country and quiet frankly I have a right to be, so let me take my time.

So, what is next? Are we just really really screwed?

Yes.