Posted in Travel, Parenting, Lifestyle.

My Nonsense

Okay, so my life just took a shitty turn guys. You get to a point where you think you’ve lived through the drama, and that stuff doesn’t bother you. You tell it to bugger off. At this point in my life, I thought my job was to help other people with my drama-filled experienced. Here I am, though, completed kicked in the knees by my past and present. I’m sitting here thinking, “I have done this. I HAVE DONE THIS SO DAMN MANY TIMES.” This should not rattle me. This is new, though. In some weird, unknown way, this is new. This repeats on me, why? How? I’d like to think through no fault of my own, but it repeats continuously. Today, right now, it has a tanginess, and I cannot explain.

Today, this day. I never thought I would have to deal with this. I should have thought better. Known better. I don’t understand why this is even important. I am one of those people who take things. I don’t go around being emotional and illogical about issues. I think, and then I decide what my move will be. Today, I thought and then I decided I just don’t want to deal.

My entire life has been dealing with something like this. Y’all know what I’m talking about? I know you’ve been there.

When people won’t cut you a break, and you know they know they should. Yeah, that. I’m worn out by the drama that’s always been here and I’ve always been prepared for it.

I think its because I am not ready to hold my tongue, or my fists for that matter. Been doing that for far too long. Feels good to admit that.

Violence is bad kids.

Sidenote: a long time someone in Turkey gave me a crown made of roses and I pretended to be a princess for the rest of the day.

Thank you for listening to my nonsense.

Posted in Travel, Parenting, Lifestyle.

Reality Is Broken

There are some things we know to be facts. Others, we know to be our facts. That is to say, we find them our truths. They are absolutely true for us but no one else ever sees them as we do. Some of us spend a lifetime convincing others to see things as they see them some, well, some turn off the lights. Not everyone is worthy of our truth. Some of it is ours, we need to let it be that way. Or maybe it’s not that we need to let it be, maybe it has to be that way.
After all the world has to come to some realizations on its own. Not everything is taught, some things have to be experienced. It is a rather painful realization. Especially for someone or “someones” who have seen life left, right, upside, and sideways. You want to grab everyone and stop them from going down that road.
No, it’s dark, it’s ugly. There are no wolves. There are no scary wolves but grandma’s house isn’t safe either. No one is going to come to save you. If you would just listen. Just. Listen.
That’s not the dress you want, someone washed blood stains from it this morning. I’ve seen it. If you only knew. I could only see what I saw. If I could only tell you things I have seen or I’m seeing right now.
I guess you have to wait until you get to grandma’s house and find there’s no way where that’s safe.

You will have to the gaping wound yourself to realize everything is tainted with blood.
There is very little we can do to tell. Seeing is believing. Sometimes even that doesn’t work when people have chosen to turn a blind eye.
I still choose to keep my facts close to my heart because it is very easy to get lost in the deception of everything around us.

facts #reality #realityisbroken #deceptionofreality #mytruth #myfacts #youarenotreal #letitbeknown #listen #hear #stainsofblood #myexperience #myworld #professionalscribbler #towhomitmayconcern

P.S: If any of what I write interests you, maybe you want to hear me talk about some boring shit on my youtube channel on Femmerang.
until we meet again.

Posted in Travel, Parenting, Lifestyle.

Bye Bye 2020

2020 is gone, we hold the power to make whatever we want 2021 to be. Yeah, a load of bull crap, it will be, what it will be. There is some truth to training your mind heart to dealing with the worst a bit better. You don’t have to be completely lost. You have to be a total disaster. Let’s hope 2021 doesn’t hit us like a ton of bricks like 2019 and then ESPECIALLY 2020 did.

Whatever does happen though; let’s be ready to deal with it though.
Get in touch with Femmerang’s Wellness Team we will give you the tools to deal with any emotional and mental problem that comes your way or that you may already be dealing with.
We are here for you and always will be, no questions asked, no judgement, anonymously if that’s what you need.
Try it, you have nothing to lose.
for appointments contact us
WhatsApp: +9203055666898

wellness #femmerangwellnes #femalewellness #wedeservebetter #womenandmentalhealth #talktous #letushelpyou #selfawareness #femmerang #mentalhealthmatters #selfcare #stress #mindfulness #anxiety #health #depression #wellbeing#youmatter #youmattertous #femmerang #femmeرنگ

Posted in Travel, Parenting, Lifestyle.

The Superhero Curse of the Russo Brothers

I want it all back. Everything that we’ve lost, all that is not here anymore. I want it all here and now. Does this sound like a child plead? Well, I am surrounded by young boys, either they were going to start sounding like me or me like them; those boys are hard to break. So, here I am stubborn as a child wanting all of it to go back to the way it used to be. We don’t even completely understand what we lost until we go back and look at what we had. We lost our innocence. We lost the real sense of right and wrong. We lost our battles of good and evil. I know I’m not the only one who feels this way. We want our superheroes back. We want to be innocent again. We want to know that there is some corner somewhere where we are safe and protected, somewhere far away rain stops, and the sun comes out with a great big rainbow.

I want my clean-cut handsome no-nonsense grandpa superhero.

The man who has an actual beautiful mind and the face of, well…Mark Ruffalo.

The diva who thinks he’s always right because he IS right, and he knows it.

The mighty god who has the will to turn realms at his feet and the tenderness to shed tears over the shadows of the past.

The King, the one who belongs to all our hearts. We will take him as he is for, he is free to rule as he pleases but chooses humbleness as his guide. No leader is a greater teacher in that world than he is.

The badass Superhero woman without whom all these larger-than-life men wouldn’t know which direction the sun comes up. I want Nat back. She deserved so much better.

Who can forget Scarlet Which, technically she’s not a part of the OG MCU Avengers but she has earned the right to be in any list that talks about superheroes anywhere. I want a movie with just her and Black widow. I know that can never happen but the least we can do is acknowledge the physical and emotional strength of these women who lost so much and still were expected to baby these men and be nurturing to them. Did anyone catch that or was it just me? Just me then?

That will be a different article, don’t you worry.

I Especially want Clint Barton back, we all need the real Clint. Are any of you aware that he is supposed to be blind and deaf? He knows sign language and is an expert in Martial Arts and some other cool stuff that I forgot about. The point is MCU did this dude dirty. Wouldn’t it be cool to have a superhero who so many people could relate to? A special needs superhero who can kick-ass? Can you see the importance of it in our world?

I was so happy to see the emotionally unstable, fat Thor because he resonated as the real hero. He was flawed but strong. His strength came through in the end when he knew he had nothing more left to lose and everything to give to the world that was counting on him to make it right. Aren’t we all the strongest when we have nothing more left to lose?

We can all use a little more Ronin/Hawkeye as he is meant to be.

Endgame came and the world…the real world went to shit, is it just me? Or did you guys also feel like the  Russo brothers cursed us into this life?

Just think about it; We were all okay right before Stark died and Rogers hung up that shield.

I mean, I don’t really believe that of course, but don’t I?

#superheroes #marvelheroes #mcu #tonystark #hulk #theherocurse #marvelsuperheroes #marveluniverse #steverogers #cap #scarleteverything

Posted in Travel, Parenting, Lifestyle.

Find Me

I will find you. I know. I am not alone. I am not the only one who thinks of my strength. I am not the only one who thinks of me. I know you are there somewhere. You are are here. Surrounded. Around me. I will find you. You will be with the ashes of my burning soul. You will be with me. I will know you. I will be that person who gets known, gets seen. I will be seen by you. I will see you because you will know.

You will know, wont you? You will want to know, wont you? There are times when even I don’t want to know. I want you to always want to know. You have always been that person. That constant. I cant keep losing you. I cant keep losing you in the crowd, in the noise. It’s been too many years.

You remember. You remember those days when we were something. Something more than, less than. The days when being less and more was everything.

I remember my soul. I remember it so clearly as if it was yesterday. I will find my soul again. I will find it again.

As time passes by we become something of a mystery to ourselves and then we along with everyone else wonder how things are what they are. I wonder that too. Where are you now? Where is my soul? You own the ashes, for you burnt it all to the ground. Only you can bring it back. Whatever it is, you have it.

You own it. You know it or you don’t.

You will find me.

Find me.

Posted in Travel, Parenting, Lifestyle.


My newest youtube video is about my kids riding the rickshaw for the first time. This is a shameless plug with a message that we have become one of those people. Yes, one of THOSE PEOPLE

It’s also a kind of awareness that I need to start raising my kids a bit differently. Which really means I need to start living differently. When was the last time I truly stepped out of my comfort zone? When was the last time I looked at what really scares me? When was the last time?..oh you get it.

Any way, did I mention I’m a youtube star now? Or a youtuber, whatever they call those.

Go to femmerang.

Posted in Travel, Parenting, Lifestyle.

The Colors We Dont See

Every night I close my eyes to sleep. Every night the same beautiful colors dance around me. There is no pain. There is no sadness, there is no hurt. Where did you come from? I ask.
Where? Right here. We came from within you. We are you: the red, blue, yellow, pink. Blood, bruise, anger, fear, pain; that’s us. Your soul has drowned in us.

Now you don’t feel the feelings, now you see colors, now you FEEL all of us as a part of you. We are your pleasure. Your dancing companions. Isn’t it pretty? they asked. The rhythms are to die for, don’t you think? And die I shall for the beauty around me.
Artist: @sikandar.shazia

beauty #beautytodiefor #dieishall #shaziasikander #pain #fear #danceforlife #danceforme #thereslifeinme #liveishallaswell #onceandforall #beautyineverything #womanhood #womenempowerment #women #womeninspiringwomen #femaleartists #supportfemaleartist #femmerang #femmeرنگ #professionalscribbler #towhomitmayconcern