Posted in Travel, Parenting, Lifestyle.

My Nonsense

Okay, so my life just took a shitty turn guys. You get to a point where you think you’ve lived through the drama, and that stuff doesn’t bother you. You tell it to bugger off. At this point in my life, I thought my job was to help other people with my drama-filled experienced. Here I am, though, completed kicked in the knees by my past and present. I’m sitting here thinking, “I have done this. I HAVE DONE THIS SO DAMN MANY TIMES.” This should not rattle me. This is new, though. In some weird, unknown way, this is new. This repeats on me, why? How? I’d like to think through no fault of my own, but it repeats continuously. Today, right now, it has a tanginess, and I cannot explain.

Today, this day. I never thought I would have to deal with this. I should have thought better. Known better. I don’t understand why this is even important. I am one of those people who take things. I don’t go around being emotional and illogical about issues. I think, and then I decide what my move will be. Today, I thought and then I decided I just don’t want to deal.

My entire life has been dealing with something like this. Y’all know what I’m talking about? I know you’ve been there.

When people won’t cut you a break, and you know they know they should. Yeah, that. I’m worn out by the drama that’s always been here and I’ve always been prepared for it.

I think its because I am not ready to hold my tongue, or my fists for that matter. Been doing that for far too long. Feels good to admit that.

Violence is bad kids.

Sidenote: a long time someone in Turkey gave me a crown made of roses and I pretended to be a princess for the rest of the day.

Thank you for listening to my nonsense.

Posted in Travel, Parenting, Lifestyle.

Find Me

I will find you. I know. I am not alone. I am not the only one who thinks of my strength. I am not the only one who thinks of me. I know you are there somewhere. You are are here. Surrounded. Around me. I will find you. You will be with the ashes of my burning soul. You will be with me. I will know you. I will be that person who gets known, gets seen. I will be seen by you. I will see you because you will know.

You will know, wont you? You will want to know, wont you? There are times when even I don’t want to know. I want you to always want to know. You have always been that person. That constant. I cant keep losing you. I cant keep losing you in the crowd, in the noise. It’s been too many years.

You remember. You remember those days when we were something. Something more than, less than. The days when being less and more was everything.

I remember my soul. I remember it so clearly as if it was yesterday. I will find my soul again. I will find it again.

As time passes by we become something of a mystery to ourselves and then we along with everyone else wonder how things are what they are. I wonder that too. Where are you now? Where is my soul? You own the ashes, for you burnt it all to the ground. Only you can bring it back. Whatever it is, you have it.

You own it. You know it or you don’t.

You will find me.

Find me.

Posted in Travel, Parenting, Lifestyle.


My newest youtube video is about my kids riding the rickshaw for the first time. This is a shameless plug with a message that we have become one of those people. Yes, one of THOSE PEOPLE

It’s also a kind of awareness that I need to start raising my kids a bit differently. Which really means I need to start living differently. When was the last time I truly stepped out of my comfort zone? When was the last time I looked at what really scares me? When was the last time?..oh you get it.

Any way, did I mention I’m a youtube star now? Or a youtuber, whatever they call those.

Go to femmerang.

Posted in Travel, Parenting, Lifestyle.

The Colors We Dont See

Every night I close my eyes to sleep. Every night the same beautiful colors dance around me. There is no pain. There is no sadness, there is no hurt. Where did you come from? I ask.
Where? Right here. We came from within you. We are you: the red, blue, yellow, pink. Blood, bruise, anger, fear, pain; that’s us. Your soul has drowned in us.

Now you don’t feel the feelings, now you see colors, now you FEEL all of us as a part of you. We are your pleasure. Your dancing companions. Isn’t it pretty? they asked. The rhythms are to die for, don’t you think? And die I shall for the beauty around me.
Artist: @sikandar.shazia

beauty #beautytodiefor #dieishall #shaziasikander #pain #fear #danceforlife #danceforme #thereslifeinme #liveishallaswell #onceandforall #beautyineverything #womanhood #womenempowerment #women #womeninspiringwomen #femaleartists #supportfemaleartist #femmerang #femmeرنگ #professionalscribbler #towhomitmayconcern

Posted in Travel, Parenting, Lifestyle.

Your Silence

Wish this was so. It’s easy to hide behind the pretty, the fun and the colorful. Our silence in the matters that matter will not protect us from what is coming. We must pick a side, the cruel the opprossers have chosen one and I assure you it is not ours.

speakup #breakthesilence #protecttheweak #protectyourself #protectothers #silence #nosilence #speak #saythetruth #truth #towhomitmayconcern #professionalscribbler