Something has been bothering me. And you know anything that bothers us blogger types, we right about it. Yep. That is what we do. We think we’re so cool with, our, “ugh this is so uncool I need to tell the world about it”. No, but for real this is something I need to tell everyone about. This one is actually important. No joke.
Also, I’m a real blogger now. That’s what I tell people. You should too. About me, that is.
All of a sudden being a girly girl is not being a woman. We only get to be proud of being tough. I want to own being a Disney fan and a girly girl. I want to own liking purple and watching beauty and the beast and someone to say ,” THATS a woman”. What’s wrong with that? Why can’t I be all that and still be empowered? Why do I have to be colorless to be strong? Why do I have to be screaming, screeching, telling someone something is wrong somewhere to be strong? Strength doesn’t necessarily mean anger and wrath.
Strength of character doesn’t mean not being able to show emotion. I see so many news articles, or even opinion articles about how certain women were so “badass” or “strong” because they “set someone straight”. I understand that our voices have to be louder than that of men to be heard otherwise we can get lost in the noise.
I also understand that I made many people cringe with the Disney and the pink and purple and I have opened up so many discussions. Here is my point though: I am a Disney fan. I still believe along with being that I can still be a feminist. That doesn’t mean I don’t see the problems with Disney movies and characters. I can wear pink and speak softly and still climb up that ladder and stand next to a man in any competition that I need to. That doesn’t mean I’ll end up flirting with them. Just because I am wearing a softer color, or just because I’m wearing a smiling rather than a bitchy attitude doesn’t mean Im for sure going to sleep my way up.
The problem is though that we are starting to do this to ourselves. This woman or girl is so cool because she is just like a guy. “Elsa was a ‘leader’ like her father”. “We need more women who can be Kings”. Where are the queens and princess who can lead like princess and queens?
Where is the softness that is a trademark of a woman? Why are we being taught to forsake that? That I don’t believe is feminism. If you ask me, which I realize that you are not, is the opposite of feminism. Women are soft and gentle. We are also strong and vicious. We aren’t just badass when we are screaming and fighting. We can be badass when we are being kind and trying to hold down an entire house. We can be badass when we are trying to calmly handle situations that need a sharp mind and a gentle loving touch. We can be badass when we are in charge of a nation. We may not have done that in the US yet but it has happened in many other countries.
What it means to be a woman is being changed by those who don’t really understand what a woman really is. I’ve worked; I’ve been the employ and the employer. I know a little bit about how this whole thing works. Sure no one takes you seriously unless you ”act like a man” because unfortunately that’s how our twisted world works. However, it’s pretty cool when we do things our way. It’s by no means easy, and by no means fun. The only thing I’m emphasizing here is that we as women should not fall for this B.S that we need to lose our femininity to be successful or better. I believe we need to do just the opposite; we need to keep it at full blast. We need to own it. That is what makes our point of view unique and makes us the different half. That’s why we work well together because men and women bring something different to the table, something equally important.
I have a hard time getting taken seriously. I run a household. Ran a business, and I still had men who were barely out of school telling me how to do my job. Why? Because I wasn’t doing it like a tough woman, or maybe just because I was a woman. So, that’s when I would smooth the creases of my face look at them dead in the eye and say, “ I have a successfully running business and double the degrees you do. Talk to me when you have achieved any of those things.”
I realize the problem goes way beyond just minor criticism for us and I am not undermining that in anyway. The purpose of this post is to simply state that we are great when are ourselves. Im tired of the comparison of men and women. There is no comparison. I don’t even want to say that we are better. I’m tired of the tug of war with the father of our children, our brothers and fathers. We are both great in our abilities. We can both conquer the world with our own capabilities. We don’t need to hijack each other’s or undermine our own to feel fulfilled.