I don’t write much about relationships, or love. Even though, EVEN THOUGH you could say I’m somewhat of an expert on the subject. Actually, let’s not say that. There’s no rating on this and my kids might come across this some day. What I want to say is that I know enough. You could say that I could teach a class on this sort of stuff. Not because I have had so many, rather, the few meaningful relationships that I have had, have lasted so long and have been pretty trying. Anyone who has been in a long-term relationship of any kind will agree. It’s not a sign of a good or bad relationship. It just is what it is.
These days there’s a lot of talk of new relationships, marriage around me. Vacations, holidays, everyone’s showing off their new Love by signing those papers. Of course, when two people tie the knot, as they say, those are the things next in line. Although, I do wonder why they say that, families become entangled and knotted for life as well. And those are also relationships that need managing. Keep ups, maintenance, frequent checks, that sort of thing., It’s like a big rope all tangled and no one can find the ends.
I realize that what I just said may make you think that I’m not a romantic person. Not true. I’m a romantic realist (that’s not a real thing). I like romance as long it’s with a real person who is genuinely right in front of me. People can make claims that they love someone, whether it’s their mother, father, sibling, a lover, but actually loving someone and actually making real sacrifices to let yourself be loved, that’s a challenge that most people are not strong enough to handle.
Confused yet? I know, I have that effect on people.
Any guesses as to why I have decided to talk about love? I love being in love. But I hate talking about it because I don’t think anyone gets my thought process on this issue (pretty much like most issue).
Love is not about finding a soul mate. Love is not about finding people who you cannot live without. Every person is self-sufficient.
When you love someone your priorities change. You, YOURSELF don’t change but what you prefer to do when, and who with changes drastically. You might like the same food but the aroma might have a different significance, it might carry a special meaning.
Love is having deep care and respect for another. Did ya catch that? RESPECT! there’s no love without respect.
Love is when my sons put my shoes in front of me before I even step off the bed without being told because they know I don’t like to be without shoes.
Love is both my boys always going over to my desk and fixing the LionKing mug because they know it’s important to me. They know it has to be in a certain spot.
Love is also anticipating what your wife to be might enjoy on a random day and sending her a useless emoji pillow just to make her day a little bit brighter.
Love is these two. Cousins that grew up like sisters. They don’t even know what they mean to each other. You know what they say about twins? You pinch one and the other feels the pain? They have some freaky connection like that.
Love is a big brother taking a leap almost to his death to save his little brother. We say to our loved ones, “I’d give my life for you”. How many of us actually mean it? I don’t know if I know many people who would actually do something like this. However, that is what you do when love is at stake, jump in with open arms.
Love is my Doctor Who mug.
There are many examples of different kinds of relationships that I’m not mentioning. Some are actually really good: real solid.
I’m not putting them down here because those are the ones we expect when we talk about love. I want to have those marriages and friendships when I grow up but that’s what all people look at and say, ”yep that’s it”. While that’s true, we need to open up the box and start looking outside to see how much we’re spreading it around to others who matter. How much we are giving it to those who are here every day and we would like to keep them here. Because guess what people do? They leave. They don’t just get dead or get sick. No. They just walk out because we tell them with our actions that we are not around or that we are too busy to pay attention.
I’ve seen people walk out of my life for many reasons. It’s been death, its been because someone understood what they were worth more than me. What all of that has taught me is that I deserve to be loved and to be taken care of too. Yeah, not where you thought this was going. No…I was just checking if you were still paying attention.
In actuality, it is a two-way street. Do better get better. I’m out of cliches. I hope you’re feeling loved and respected.
Oh, I didn’t tell you why I’m writing about love and relationships. Well, you know sometimes you just gotta tell people that you love them. I feel that we have become a culture who relies too much on fake expressions. It’s not verbal and it is not action. It’s some third thing that’s somewhere in the atmosphere that we are all supposed to just understand. I write it down somewhere, and you see it along with thousands of people and now you know that I love you because I said it in front of so many people. That’s valid I’m sure. However, let’s start getting personal. Let’s start making it about those people only that we are claiming to love. Yeah?
Confusing crazy lady thanks you for your time and attention.