Time flies they say. Not when you’re raising two pre-tween children. Days go by in a frenzy of school assignments, tests, homework’s, pranks, fights, cuddles and threats of taking away one privilege or another if they don’t do what they’re told.

Weeks, months and years are a totally different story. They are stretched out. Never ending. As parents we are in awe of these creatures who are learning, adapting and finding out about the world with or without our help. Every day is brand new for them even if it feels the same for us.

They absolutely don’t take growing up for granted, they cherish it and make sure we remember how special it is to be a certain age. Today my younger son turned nine years old. The whole day I was thinking about when I was nine. My mom never celebrated birthdays, so I’m not really big on celebrating bdays either but what I’m in favor of is letting the kids feel important once in a while. Letting them feel as though they are the center of our lives at least once a year. Because let’s face it, they are not the center of anything every day, and they will not be for the world and even for us no matter how much we love them. And we do love them fiercely.

Thank you @ganache_by_madiha for always coming through with the most amazing gluten free cake at the last minute for my brat.

#birthday #happybirthday #myboys #lovemyboys #lifelessons #lifegoesby #bdaycake #mommyblogger #parentofinstagram #professionalscribbler #towhomitmayconcern

Whenever I read the Quran I make sure to read the Tafseer to really try and understand what Allah has tried to tell us or teach us here. Surah Furqan was revealed in Maccah at a time of great famine and a time when The Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) was facing a lot of abuse physical but mostly verbal.

We know that his family and the rich had cut them off so I’m sure the threat of being hungry and homeless along with the insults that they were throwing at him and his companions would have been heartbreaking for the Prophet (PBUH).

Y’all know I don’t post this kind of stuff because I like to keep my religion close to my heart for many reasons. However, some things jump at you and you just know they have to be said out loud. This is one of those times.

I had a particularly difficult week last week. This also affected some of the closest people to me. People that I would give anything for, short of my life. Well, I might consider my life too under some circumstances.

I was traveling back from being with them. On the plane, I opened up my Quran app and just clicked on a random surah to listen to. I landed on Surah Furqan. Furqan means the Criterion, ‘between good and evil’. Right and wrong. It starts out comforting the Prophet (PBUH) and telling him that Allah is in charge of everything and that the ones who are hurting the Prophet (PBUH) are cowards. Evildoers are always cowards.

These ayas especially spoke to me. I was coming back full of worry about the future, I was worried about some of the exact things Allah had mentioned in that Surah. I was hurt and disturbed, and extremely angry about the insults and humiliation we were having to endure for absolutely doing the right thing. I am usually not this cocky, I know anyone can make mistakes but this time whatever started this mess was not any kind of mistake. It was pure vengeance and hate from others. I Wouldn’t be able to tell you why even if I wanted to.

Reading this calmed me. This was the reassurance I needed. If we have that Being looking out for us, raising us up, and taking care of us then what harm can one or two or three humans bring to us? And even if they succeed, for how long? Judgment comes soon enough, whether in this world or not. I make Duaa that Allah gives everyone Hidayat because that judgment is not a thing anyone wants to face. I make Duaa that I never find myself feeling above any person and keep Rehm in my heart for Allah’s creation.

As women, especially working women we feel we miss out on so much of the Ibadah. We have always been made to feel guilty for not praying or worshiping a certain way. But when we try we are called out on neglecting our responsibilities as a woman. Let’s talk about what is the right balance, do we even need a balance? Are there limits or are we just creating them?
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April 2nd SATURDAY
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Anger always has a feeling behind it. Find it. Deal with it. Usually it’s sadness and grief. Loss of a loved one. Loss of time. Loss of a lie that gave us comfort. Sit with your feelings before reacting, they might be absolutely valid, however when they come out as anger we may not find a single friend in the world.

#hardtruth #reality #anger #validbutnotokay #giveyourselfgrace #sitwithit #longroadahead #dealwithit #momlessonoftheday #towhomitmayconcern #professionalscribbler

I have seen those who claim to be “found” and enlightened. I pray to God I never become like those. If history is any evidence, I would much rather be “lost” and enjoy my life with the dignity it brings.
You are welcome to join me, I usually have cheesecake! 🙂

bornlost #borntofindmupurpose #historyrepeats #dignityofbeinghuman #beinglost #nopleasureinbeingfound #keepthestrength #proffessionalscribbler #towhomitmayconcern

I have been chasing happiness for as long as I can remember. I do remember being happy. I also remember being extremely unhappy. What I don’t remember is true happiness. So I chase it. It’s right here, within reach. However the second I lose sight of it I forget that I am happy and that my happiness is all around me. So I chase it.

 

The moments that I cannot escape are my happiness. My children, the running, laughing, with stars in their eyes and always a spring in their step miracles; they are my happiness. Then I watch them run into a distance and my heart is restless. So I chase that feeling I had a few moments ago. I am unsure, there is a certain uneasiness in my soul. I have often wondered if I ever loved someone or something as fearlessly and mercilessly as I do my children. I have wondered what I did with my worries and my heart before they came along. 

 

I remember that there has been plenty of happiness to chase. My mind has never been free of the burden of loving mercilessly. My soul has Survived darkness because of the happiness these hearts brought me.

Time doesn’t stop or slow down for anyone. As I hold on to my boys and my hearts I realize the sky is filling up with stars shining just as brightly as the ones I’m holding on to.  

Time is ever-flowing. Yes. It does, however,  give chances; second, third, love will grow in numbers, hearts, in stars, if you let it.

 Let it.

There is no happiness, there is no permanent joy. There are only moments. Find them. There are only those we love, we have to let them create memories their memories for us. We have to let them chase their own happiness so they can keep filling the sky with stars brighter than the sun and as fierce and free as love itself.

So keep chasing happiness.

 

Learn to say NO. The only way to show love and care for others is not to give of yourself until you have burnt out. Tell them that it’s not a good time. Explain the extent of your situation to them. If you are afraid that they will be upset then that right there should be a red flag to a toxic relationship. If the fear is in your head and you have never tried to tell them how you feel then try it, you might find them more supportive than you’re giving them credit.
Either way, your sanity is important. Any relationship has to be two-ways to be a healthy one. If the expectations are leaning too much in any one direction, toxicity will eventually create problems.
The general understanding should be that no means no under any circumstance, in any type of relationship without hesitation.

speakup #beyou #wematter #sayno #nomeansno #bereal #keepmoving #kindnessisnotaweakness #helpyourself #bestrong #speakup #no #toxicfree #iamnotarobot #noguilttrips #relationshipstruggles #towhomitmayconcern #professionalscribbler

Reality Check:
Our reality is made for us and us alone. Kind of a strange thing to say, ain’t it? We imagine the world in a certain way, then the world happens to us and we are left in awe of reality. We control only our actions. Ironically we don’t even control our thoughts. At times even our actions get away from us.
I can think of a few examples for myself where my thoughts and actions got away from me. I can think of many instances where I wish I had acted differently. I wish I had said something else. I didn’t, only because in my reality things weren’t supposed to go down that way. In my reality, people were supposed to see things my way. They were supposed to “understand”. They were supposed to “know”.
They were not supposed to be so irresponsible and absurd. The world was supposed to understand how important this issue, event, or incident is TO ME. I am the central part of this issue. Why have they not seen this?
In MY opinion, what they should have done is this…

If it had been that way things would have been the way my reality demands it and the outcome would have been as I had imagined and the world would be right.
We forget in those moments that we and the people closest to us are not the only ones living in that exact reality. The world overlaps a million times over.
That same event, situation interrupts the lives of so many. So how is our life event more valuable than that of someone outside of our reality’s viewpoint?
I have written and said and written the word reality so many times that it is starting to sound unreal.
Un-real! That’s the word for the other person’s reality in our head. Same world different realities. Nope, one world, one reality. Simplify the world that we live in with everyone. Not every situation is happening to us, it’s just happening around us. Accept it, live with it.

realitycheck #reality #reallife #unreal #mylife #letgo #daretolive #daretoletgo #yourlife #keepgoing #keepsmiling #longroad #acceptthetruth #acceptthereality #noexcuses #oneworld #onepeople #liveit #liveauthentic #towhomitmayconcern #professionalscribbler

What’s more perfect one day before you when all the panic is starting to set in than having coffee while Watching a holiday baking show meanwhile one kid visits a friend and the other packs for him and his brother.
Let’s pretend for a few minutes they don’t have a project due tomorrow and I don’t have a house to wrap up. I guess Dawud has the packing covered. My travel anxiety and Dawuds packing skills; let’s see what comes of it.

travel #vacation #packing #momlife #packing #travelanxiety #myboys #letspanictogether #myboys #mytravelbuddies #propackers #professionalscribbler #towhomitmayconcern

Life is extremely entertaining, that is if you want it to be. A week after I took these pictures both my boys decided they don’t want to take Taekwondo anymore. Not sure what the right parenting move is at this point. Do I tell them, we don’t quit or do I say, eh it’s cool, you do you. As of now I’m going with “you do you”.

What’s funny to me though is that all of you probably think I’m a soccer mom with kids who are involved in all sorts of extra curriculars. Am I giving myself too much credit? Have y’all figured me out? I promised my kids 3 days ago that I would clean their play area with them and here I am “on Instagram again” as my younger one would put it. Yes, it’s the other way around in our house. My kids get upset with me for being on Instagram. I mean my work is mostly social media and internet related. Point being I’m a lazy mom. That has its benefits though. They have been cleaning it themselves. The process has been slower but they are working on it. They are making decisions on what goes where. Small decisions like one box for cars, one box for action figures, etc. This is teaching them how to organize their stuff, something that I used to do beyond their school bags. Lazy parenting has its benefits. I will go in the end when they’ve done most of the work and they have a sense of accomplishment to finish it up. and give it my final touches. Even now I go and just give them some ideas in a way that they think it’s their own and let them do the work. I started out with a different point, which was that not everything is as it seems. My kids are not high achievers. I am not a “have everything together” kind of mom. The activities I may have so proudly talked about are long gone because we don’t take life too seriously.

If anyone is showing you a perfect version of themselves and their life with their kids where they and their kids are making no mistakes they are not telling you the truth. Don’t let that discourage you. However you are choosing to raise your children is the right way, there are no bad kids and no bad moms just horrible humans who make other humans feel bad. ags. Lazy parenting has its benefits. I will go in the end to finish it up once they’ve done most of the work and have a sense of accomplishment. Even now I go and just give them some ideas in a way that they think it’s their own and let them do the work. I started with a different point, which was that not everything is as it seems. My kids are not high achievers but I do make them work hard. I am not a “have everything together” kind of mom. The activities I may have so proudly talked about are long gone because we don’t take life too seriously.

If anyone is showing you a perfect version of themselves and their life with their kids where they and their kids are making no mistakes they are not telling you the truth. Don’t let that discourage you. However you are choosing to raise your children is the right way, there are no bad kids and no bad moms just horrible humans who make other humans feel bad.

momming #lazymomming #lazyparenting #boys #youdoyou #raisingboys #raisingkids #parenting #instagramparenting #instaparenting #momblogger #mommybloggerlife #thereality #myboys #lovemyboys #letitbe #parentsofinstagram #momsofinstagram #professionalscribbler #towhomitmayconcern